A few years ago a female student wanted to visit with me about some difficulties she was having, mainly with her family life. As is my practice, we walked around campus as we talked.
After talking for some time about her family situation we turned to other areas of her life. When she reached spiritual matters we had the following exchange:
Obviously, I was being a bit provocative with the student. And I did go on to clarify. But I was trying to push back on a strain of Christianity I see in both my students and the larger Christian culture. Specifically, when the student said "I need to work on my relationship with God" I knew exactly what she meant. It meant praying more, getting up early to study the bible, to start going back to church. Things along those lines. The goal of these activities is to get "closer" to God. To "waste time with Jesus." Of course, please hear me on this point, nothing is wrong with those activities. Personal acts of piety and devotion are vital to a vibrant spiritual life and continued spiritual formation. But all too often "working on my relationship with God" has almost nothing to do with trying to become a more decent human being."I need to spend more time working on my relationship with God."I responded, "Why would you want to do that?"Startled she says, "What do you mean?""Well, why would you want to spend any time at all on working on your relationship with God?""Isn't that what I'm supposed to do?""Let me answer by asking you a question. Can you think of anyone, right now, to whom you need to apologize? Anyone you've wronged?"She thinks and answers, "Yes.""Well, why don't you give them a call today and ask for their forgiveness. That might be a better use of your time than working on your relationship with God."
The trouble with contemporary Christianity is that a massive bait and switch is going on. "Christianity" has essentially become a mechanism for allowing millions of people to replace being a decent human being with something else, an endorsed "spiritual" substitute. For example, rather than being a decent human being the following is a list of some commonly acceptable substitutes:
Going to churchWorshipPrayingSpiritual disciplines (e.g., fasting)Bible studyVoting RepublicanGoing on spiritual retreatsReading religious booksArguing with evolutionistsSending your child to a Christian school or providing education at homeUsing religious languageAvoiding R-rated moviesNot reading Harry Potter.
The point is that one can fill a life full of spiritual activities without ever, actually, trying to become a more decent human being. Much of this activity can actually distract one from becoming a more decent human being. In fact, some of these activities make you worse, interpersonally speaking. Many churches are jerk factories.
Take, for example, how Christians tip and behave in restaurants. If you have ever worked in the restaurant industry you know the reputation of the Sunday morning lunch crowd. Millions of Christians go to lunch after church on Sundays and their behavior is abysmal. The single most damaging phenomenon to the witness of Christianity in America today is the collective behavior of the Sunday morning lunch crowd. Never has a more well-dressed, entitled, dismissive, haughty or cheap collection of Christians been seen on the face of the earth.
I exaggerate of course. But I hope you see my point. Rather than pouring our efforts into two hours of worship, bible study and Christian fellowship on Sunday why don't we just take a moment and a few extra bucks to act like a decent human being when we go to lunch afterwards? Just think about it. What if the entire restaurant industry actually began to look forward to working Sunday lunch? If they said amongst themselves, "I love the church crowd. They are kind, patient and very generous. It's my favorite part of the week waiting on Christians." How might such a change affect the way the world sees us? Think about it. Just being a decent human being for one hour each Sunday and the world sees us in a whole new way.
But it's not going to happen. Because behavior at lunch isn't considered to be "working on your relationship with God." Behavior at lunch isn't spiritual. Going to church, well, that is working on your relationship with God. But, as we all know, any jerk can sit in a pew. But you can't be a jerk if you take the time to treat your waitress as if she were your friend, daughter or mother.
My point in all this is that contemporary Christianity has lost its way. Christians don't wake up every morning thinking about how to become a more decent human being. Instead, they wake up trying to "work on their relationship with God" which very often has nothing to do with treating people better. How could such a confusion have occurred? How did we end up going so wrong? I'm sure there are lots of answers, but at the end of the day we need to face up to our collective failure. I'm not saying we need to do anything dramatic. A baby step would do to start. Waking up trying to be a little more kind, more generous, more interruptible, more forgiving, more humble, more civil, more tolerant. Do these things and prayer and worship will come alongside to support us.
I truly want people to spend time working on their relationship with God. I just want them to do it by taking the time to care about the person standing right in front of them.
You are missing the point of being a Christian. Being a Christian is not about being a decent person, it is about following after the teaching of Jesus Christ and doing what He wants us to do. Being nice to people is not what Jesus did, He tells us that he came not to unit but to divide. You will be a decent caring person if you are closer to Christ but then again that depends on what you call a decent person or what you call rude. If I go by what others tell me then I will never be either one of those for everyone has their own opinion of what is decend and what is rude. So I will go by the standard that God has set and has not changed sense the beginning of time. To live a life that will reflect my Savior and my God to the best of may abilities.
The simple and only answer I can think of is this: Pastors in the Christian religious sector preach that this earth is a temporary realm and not to be valued over the eternal life hereafter. This being the cause, why would anyone care to be anything other than selfish and antisocial?
cause=>case -- typo below
Really? Once zygote becomes more than one cell it is no longer a zygote, but is a blastocyst. Get your biology right, eh?
This may be a textbook perfect "grammatical rule", but from the standpoint of theoretical linguistics, it is incorrect. We linguists realize that "grammar rules" are teaching tools that have little or nothing to do with how language works. The rule is "imperative deletion". There is no implied subject. The subject is present in the deep structure of the utterance, but is deleted in the surface structure. Exactly why this occurs is a matter of debate, but all linguists agree that the subject, although deleted, is present and understood by the hearer because we understand the utterance as an imperative and so recognize the subject. Chomsky & Halle argue that imperatives need to be shortened because of some implied urgency. Since we all share similar rule sets, we can successfully decode and understand what the subject of an imperative is. It is not "implied", it is simply there, but need not be stated.
Often, doing the right thing feels good. Not always though. This atheist tries to do the right thing....because it is the right thing to do. How do I know? I don't for sure.
I am informed by looking to historical figures who spent much of their lives thinking about how to make society work - Jesus, Confucius, Ben Franklin, Lao Tsu, Kurt Vonnegut....There are many people whose thoughts I respect deeply. So I evaluate their thought, try to find common threads, try to imagine what the world would look like if everyone made the choice I am about to make.
At the end of the day, it still takes faith. For this atheist, I have to have faith that I should do the right thing to do because it is the right thing to do. There is no other motivation - no retribution in the afterlife, no supernatural rewards during my time on earth, no capricious deity to satisfy....I get one chance to do the right thing, then I will be dead and gone. And I try be good and do good.....Because it is the right thing to do.
Right is subjective and always will be. It simply depends on your goals. Is your goal to have the most people survive, is your goal to have humanity survive the longest? Living things continue as long as possible? Your ancestors to be happy and flourish? To have your country be the strongest and most flourishing in the world?
Each of those would make a difference to whether your action is the 'right' thing to do or not. Other than that, there is no 'right thing to do'.
And that's just how it is.
Standing up to corruption is not hating, it's being healthy.
I'm sorry that kind of thing bothers you, you might want to see someone about that.
When I read the bible when I was a child, I became a person who found out more, but did not become a Christian, but did become sorely disappointed with those I knew who were, now that I had found out what their religion was based on.
You really don't want to be nice to anyone else unless it's to flatter and suck up to a more powerful being? Really - in your heart of hearts? If you knew for a fact there was nothing else, you would kill babies and rape your parents?
That kind of attitude is just scarey.
Actually, to be specific only linguists who follow a formal (by which I mean generative) syntactic theory such as Chomksy's would state that the subject is present in the deep structure. We linguists who adhere to functional syntactic theories like Role and Reference Grammar, for example, would say that there is no deep structure in imperatives or anywhere else, the arguments are all present in the semantic structure but not 'deleted' in the syntax.
Now I think about it, syntactic theories could be a sermon illustration all of their own...
"In what dictionary, is Dude used as a single opening to a sentnece and
"llearn to spell and use proper grammar" is a declarative statement, but
not proper english. Were you perhaps referring to grammar lessons that
were not taught in the schools I attended as an English major in a
Christian college?"
Too bad your Christian college didn't spend a skosh more time on spelling and punctuation. You threw in a comma you didn't need, you questioned "dude" as a form of address (which, due to common usage, it is (informally), whether anyone likes it or not) and capitalized it. Now, I can ignore typos, but how do you manage a typo in something that should have been a simple cut-and-paste job? Then you accuse this person of not using proper English AND leave out the question mark that should have followed "sentnece (sic)," all in the first (two) sentence(s)!
For "not (having been) taught" grammar "in the schools (you) attended as an English major," yours is not contemptible, but it is less than perfect, as it mine... on occasion.
Next time you correct someone else, make sure you've got it right to begin with, and with a little less snark.
Thanks.
Member- Grammar Nazis Anonymous
Empirical facts do not exist to be "judged or not judged," they simply ARE.
To answer your question,
"How can you see the to take the speck out of your brothers eye if you cant "judge" him to have a speck in it?"
Just fine, thank you ever so much. After all, it's in HIS eye, not mine.
Supposing that anyone could "judge" whether someone has a mote/speck/whatever in their eye is . . . let's be nice and just say "less than bright," to avoid more of what we're talking about.
Either "my brother" has a speck in his eye or he doesn't.
If he does, help him remove it. If he doesn't, leave him alone, for anyone's sake.
This advice works both literally AND metaphorically.
Now, if you want to GET judgmental, let's talk about the part that you conveniently left OUT of your post... that of the (wooden/support, not light) BEAM in "your" eye.
THAT is what might keep one from seeing the speck in one's brother's eye.
I do think it's sad that the "Christians" who are in the spotlight and using their so-called "Christianity" to further their own narrow-minded agendas are the ones by whom "the rest of us" are being judged by those non-Christians who do judge us and pick apart and deride our faith.
TO BE FAIR- not all non-christians participate in this. I'm not trying to do the same thing by lumping everyone together. Nor am I trying to preach. There are Christians who would say that makes me a "bad Christian," that part of our faith is spreading The Word. Personally, that sounds like a judgment call that only God should be allowed to vote on, much like every other decision I've made in my life.
I am thrilled to see this....I've said this for so long and I'm so thankful someone else is thinking along these lines and not only that but calling it to others attention. Thank you
Not to be overlooked is that the guy's assessment that it was crap proved completely correct: when he wasn't suitably grateful and stroking these religious people, they went off on him - doubtless the same crap he'd often seen before.
Any Christian who doesn't see themselves in this story probably has a poor memory at best. This applies to every form of and label of Christianity from smells-and-bells Anglo-Catholics to the most icononclastic fundamentalists. Even lefty-leaning mainliners are not above the smug "worldlier-than-thous" attitudes they've copped in reaction to the legalism in which they've been raised. THANK YOU for this!
AMEN ! GOOD POINT and good for you, Doing good and serving others is what I think God want us to do. This is what Jesus our Lord and
savior did SERVE!
The single most impt commandment is to love others as we love ourselves
Thank you, thank you, thank you! We also try to manipulate God into blessing us by those religious acts. I fell into that trap many times. But God cares about our character and our ability to love the world with God's love.
.....i appreciate the courage and concern it took to write this...it's the Best post i've ever read on the topic of practical Christianity..it hints of my 12 step program...
"Allah is not
merciful to him who is not merciful to people/mankind ".
( Bukhari, Muslim )
Search islam. :)
This article is rubbish. It operates on a false assumption for what it means to "work on their relationship with God." That doesn't happen spontaneously. It requires actual action on our part and grace imparted by God.
A person who is truly in a relationship with God and growing closer to God is going to consequently be a more decent human being. That's the order of operations. You grow closer to God, then you become a better human being. It doesn't work the other way around. Human beings, by their very nature, are not decent. "Trying real hard" to be a decent human being is an experiment that has failed and will fail forevermore. God gives us the grace through the sacrifice of His Son to no longer be mired in our sin and "indecency" and our love for Him and devotion to get to know Him better causes us to learn of His attributes of love, self-sacrifice, grace, forgiveness...etc.....and the more we learn of these things the more we will take on these characteristics through His grace and our "getting closer to God."
And to all the people cheering this blog post....are you completely unfamiliar with the Bible? Do you realize Jesus spent a great portion of his ministry railing on the Pharisees? They were not true believers. They were hypocrites. They proclaimed to know God but were actually worshipers of laws. As a result they ridiculed the poor, were cruel to the diseased, and they considered themselves better than those who "weren't like them."
All this blogger is doing is complaining about those same types of people today. Except now we don't have a distinct word for them....we just blindly call them "Christians" when the people referenced in these comments are not true representatives of Christ. Christ would not refuse to rake the yard...Christ would not throw rocks at the gay man or call him names. These people you are complaining about are called hypocrites, not Christians.
To the vast majority of the people on this post, being a Christian only requires a person to say they are a Christian. If you actually read the Bible and study Jesus Christ, you would understand that it is foolish to lump all people who profess to be believers in Christ as true believers in Christ.
The people group targeted most by Jesus were the people who knew religion but didn't know God, those are the same people you are all complaining about today.
This blog post is not profound. It is unfortunately redundant...and sadly has inspired the ignorant masses to echo the same false idea over and over again. If you people existed 2000 years ago and the internet existed...you'd have to post something like this "I hate these Pharisees....they're all such a bunch of jerks! They did this, they did that...they weren't decent human beings."
Jesus would look at your comments today and say "um....these people you're calling Christians that you're complaining about? They're not Christians....they're modern day Pharisees....please stop using my name in describing them."
Thanks for your very opinionated statement of truth. I wonder as I read your posts, TallKatie, if you post to be right, or if you post to learn more.
If your goal is to be right, I would suggest beginning a blog of your own, and disabling the comments box.
Thanks for your opinion betsy. I can see you thought long and hard about it. Especially since you didn't come up with any justification.
In the future, if your goal is not see comments that you disagree with, you might try not reading any.
I wish this place was like facebook, and I could erase my message... after reading through all the comments below, I know that there is a way to say that I disagree, but it's by being respectful, not rude. And I was rude. I'm sorry, TallKatie.
One of the goals of Chistianity is to become Christ-like thus we would be come better humans. It not either/or developing a better relationship with God encludes being what christ exemples which is love. Remember we must love God with all our heart and to love our neighbor as we would love ourselves. If we treat the waiters/waitresses/as we would want to be treated we are following Gods plan for our lives. Thus we will become "better humans beings" . We falter when we believe that doing religious things to make us "good Christians" when we should always be reaching to be Christ-like. If we resolve our decision making into what would Jesus do. We are more assured of fullfilling God plans for us
When I was in youth group. (My beloved brethren know which one I mean.) I remember we took great pride in all the community service our "kid power" provided in Jesus' Name.
After youth group one Summer Sunday evening, while it was still light, I was on the front lawn of the church education building, and I noticed a bunch of kids I did not recognize working on a very overgrown yard directly across the street. There were a whole bunch, maybe 30 or 40 in all. They were really WORKING! They were almost done, and the yard was looking absoluely beautiful!
I went over and asked one of the adults what was going on. He explained that the people were very old and couldn't take care of their yard any more, so their church youth group was doing it as a service project.
I felt embarassed because I had noticed the yard many times, and had never said or done anything about it at all! We were Presbyterian. It turned out that the people across the street were members of the LDS church. (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.) ("The Mormons.")
That memory still makes me feel like a Pharisee - the kind of showy-fake-religious person that made Jesus really crazy mad!
Having worked in the food industry, I can say that there is really very little exaggeration there. It was no surprise to see my coworkers roll their eyes if I ever mentioned Christianity. Trying to single-handedly counteract the effects of week after week of Christians coming in, tying up tables in their fancy clothes, and not tipping enough to let their server make minimum wage is pretty daunting. If Christians want to help the poor, there are plenty of them waiting tables after church - how about starting there? Also, if you write "God bless!" or "Jesus loves you! :-D" on your receipt instead of tipping, that server will be feeling many things, but the love of Christ will not be among those emotions.
Im afraid you are missing the point much as the Pharisees did. Jesus very plainly said over and over that taking care of people was exactly what He meant when He asked if his followers loved Him. He even referenced several verses to the Pharisees from the OT when they called him into question about it, the most famous in Matthew is Hosea 6:6. Jesus asks the Pharisees if they know what it means "I desire mercy rather than sacrifice" when they question Him for celebrating with Matthew and his "sinner" friends AND when they question him for healing on the Sabbath. Read the last 5 or 6 chapters of the Gospel of John and then 1st John...the teaching is plain. Loving other people = loving God = righteousness = following Jesus' Commands.
"Teacher, what is the greatest Commandment in the Law"
"I tell you the truth, 'Love the Lord you God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength'. But the second greatest is just like it and can't separated from it, 'Love your neighbor like you love yourself'. On these two commands rest all of the Law and prophets."
Really? Try reading what Jesus says about that Matthew 25 34-45
I seriously believe if you are a repeated victim of hate crimes those perpetrators should be brought to justice and companies that fire you or anyone else for anything other than being incompetent in the job should be brought to book. No one should be above the law because they choose to call themselves Christian, if anything they should be held further to account as they abuse their own faith by treating others this way. Who can read the gospels and believe that is a Godly intention? I am very angry that you have been treated this way, not ashamed of my own faith but mortified to hear that people who say they share it should treat you or anyone else this way. Not everyone is like this. My prayer is that you will succeed in life despite these people seekingto hold you back. I am so sorry for you but I pray you will have true friendships so that you do not doubt your worth.
Whats with the 'Vote for Republican' part. A lot of Democrats are still Christian
I pinned this way back when I first read it. So good to read it again! Spot on!
Yet why does it seem so difficult for many Christians to behave as genuine, decent people? Perhaps it's easier as a Humanist?
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Am Cannon shelly from Usa, i am sharing about my experience and testimony online in search of a spell caster that will restore my marriage and make me live a happy life. I was introduced to a spell caster by my neighbor and i contact him. to my greatest surprise i never though that there was going to be a real spell caster for me but i was amazed when i met a real one in the person of His Majesty,HIGH PRIEST OZIGIDIDON who helped in in bring back my man and making me have a happy marriage and home and also help in restoring back my job and life and sincerely it is to numerous for me to mention, i just can't thank him more that enough for all he has done but i want to sincerely thank him for restoring my hope that there are still real spell casters out there. Indeed he is so real and true to his job. i am glad i met him and i will hold him in high esteem till i leave this earth. Your HIGHNESS i will never let you go you are my foundation.High priest can be gotten on highpriestozigididon@gmail.com. i know when you contact him and he worked for you, you will definitely come back to thank me. high priest is so great and powerful.. i have lost the adjective to classify him.Thanks
Now this is in actual fact cooperative. It’s very
openhanded of you to share this with us.
this
esoteric info
After being in relationship with him for 3 years,he broke up with me,
I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted
him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with
everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to
someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell
caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type
that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the
spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be
okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he
cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex
called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that
he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return
to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was
how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made
promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem or child
problem I would be of
help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful ---
spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from
all the fake ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell
caster, his email is dromoselspellcaster@gmail.com you can email him if you
need
his assistance in your relationship or anything. he we be ready to help you.
self regard sofia.
__
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