Satan as a Functional Theodicy, Part 4: Crypto-Jewish and Crypto-Zoroastrian Christians

As I have reflected on how Satan plays out in the minds of believers I've reached a few soft conclusions on the matter. If you are a regular reader, you know I like to spin out pet-theories on all things theological. So, here's a pet theory.

I think there are two kinds of Christians. Monotheistic Christians and Dualistic Christians. Or, more provocatively, crypto-Jewish Christians and crypto-Zoroastrian* Christians.

Monotheistic Christians tend to have a Jewish experience with God. If you look over my posts in this series, these Christians tend to have the following features/beliefs:

1. They tend to believe the Heavenly Census = 1. Or at least they experience the heavens in this way.
2. They tend to be N-Order Complaint people. Satan answers nothing in their experience. In regards to theodicy, Satan--less an Answer--is a Question that God needs to answer for.
3. Given #1 and #2, Monotheistic Christians tend to have complicated relationships with God. Both weal and woe come from God. Issues of theodicy are laid directly at God's feet. For a Monotheistic Christian there is nowhere else to go.
4. Thus, the emotional experience of Monotheistic Christians is, unsurprisingly, uniquely Jewish. The Monotheistic experience, we have noted, follows the landscape of the Psalms. That is, both praise and strong lament/complaint/accusation with God intermingle. The relationship with God is ambivalent, conflicted, and complicated.

Okay, in contrast to the Monotheistic Christian is the Dualistic Christian. Following my earlier posts, the Dualistic Christian will look more Zoroastrian. Walking through this:

1. They will tend to believe, or at least experience, the Heavenly Census > 1. More specifically, they will tend to see the heavens as a battleground between the Big Two: God and Satan. True, God is bigger and will win in the end, but the experience today looks very Zoroastrian.
2. These tend to be First-Order Complaint people. That is, Satan will functions more as Answer in theodicy discussions.
3. Given #1 and #2, Dualistic Christians, with their warfare theodicy, will be able to sort weal and woe more effectively. Some (if not all) of the woe can get "explained" by the War.
4. Thus, the emotional experience of Monotheistic Christians is less conflicted and ambivalent. There is less lament or complaint in the worship experience.

Okay, pet theory deployed.

The question for any theory is this: Can it make interesting predictions? I think this one can.

If a sub-set of Christians are crypto-Zoroastrian then we should see this: A implicit inflation of the Satan construct, where Satan beings to take on God-like (God with Big G) attributes.

I specify that the inflation of the Satan construct is implicit. It is a psychological not a theological phenomenon. Explicitly and theologically, people will reject this inflation. But implicitly, when you examine how the Satan construct functions, you see the inflation.

Two examples should illustrate what I'm talking about.

First, I have proposed the following counter-factual to many people: Imagine a world where Satan didn't exist. How would things be different?

Well, Monotheistic Christians tend to respond: "Not much." And this makes perfect sense given their monotheistic/Jewish orientation.

Dualistic Christians, and I've heard this repeatedly, tend to say this: "Evil would cease to exit." (Go ahead, ask around, you'll see this answer pop up quite a lot.)**

Now think about that answer, "Evil would cease to exist." The implicit theology is this: Satan is, ontologically, evil. Without Satan evil ceases to exist. Satan is God's Opposite.

See how Zoroastrian that formulation is? It's an inflation of the Satan concept to God-like status.

Second example.

God is generally held to be omnipresent and omniscient. What about Satan? Overtly, people would deny that Satan has these God-level abilities. But, when you begin to inquire about how Satan actually functions in the world, his abilities seem astounding, dramatically close to omnipresence and omniscience. Satan, apparently, is everywhere at once. Tempting me here in Abilene, you in your town, and someone in Asia all at the same time. There can be a variety of post-hoc explanations for this (e.g., Satan has hosts of helpers, spiritual agents can be "everywhere" in the physical realm) but functionally the outcome is the same: Satan is omnipresent.

Again, what we is an inflation of the Satan construct past what the biblical witness seems to endorse. Satan's power is increased so that he can oppose God is some strong way, strong enough to reduce complaint against God. This opposition is needed, I've suggested, to help some Christians avoid the emotional toll of monotheism. So they create, implicitly and covertly, what is, in essence, a Zoroastrian formulation.


Footnotes:
*More precisely, a particular school of Zoroastrian thought.

**I love to do this kind of descriptive theology. How are people thinking theologically "on the street"?